i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
be right there i have to get my cape
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.