her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
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