felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
