First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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