And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
