Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
