so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
