Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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