There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
