we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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