I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
