We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
