Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize