If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Well I just put wine in my tea
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize