I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
