im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
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