Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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