The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
