i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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