the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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