I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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