I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize