I hate your face
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
