I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
