I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
