I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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