tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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