so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
