this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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