and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
