oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Randomize
