Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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