That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
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What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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