scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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