glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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