I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
