we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
