I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize