Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
