Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Randomize