it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
