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• (586): View more from Michigan

  But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  Pants 0. Shit 1.

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• (650): View more from California

  you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!

  (1-650): View more from California

  noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself

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• 

  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (337): View more from Louisiana

  I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married

  (214): View more from Texas

  What? They have three kids?

  (512): View more from Texas

  Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.

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• 

  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.

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• (425): View more from Washington

  we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.

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