people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
