you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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