Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
