i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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