K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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