I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Randomize
