His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
