Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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