she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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