at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
