You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Someone shattered a urinal.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Randomize
